Happily living abnormally

I was reading through some posts today and I kept coming across one of those pet hate phrases, one that has always annoyed me ‘a normal life’, I wish someone would tell me exactly what ‘a normal life’ is. When I look back on mine I think I have had several different lives and none that I would describe a normal or abnormal. I always seem to somehow be living lives that others find odd a little odd. Through out my life I have unconsciously tried to cram in as much that was different as I could. Yesterday I showed the dark-side of my teen years but like everyone else had a good side as well. I think many would have said I was a bit of a wild child and like all kids I thought I was right, I was safe and I knew better than any adult.

My daughter in her teen years lived with her father in New Zealand so I was saved the parenting role of teenage monster. I have always found it strange how like me Teressa is, she sees it as well and it is freaky. When her father and I split, I made the decision that I thought would be best for her, she was just six year old. Jim was an officer in the Royal Navy and the Navy supplied and paid for child care and schooling. The plan was that she would be cared for by a Nanny and when old enough she would go to boarding school and get a really good education. I wanted but couldn’t take her with me, I couldn’t offer her anything, I had a job as a barmaid living in at the hotel I worked in. I couldn’t afford a flat or child care and as for an education equal to what she had ahead of her, was way out of me reach.

We saw each other as much as possible but when her father married an ex-friend of mine things got difficult. When they took her to New Zealand without telling me it was impossible. It took me nearly two years to find her. Her father thought I must have used a PI but it was easier than that. I knew which country she was in, the new owners of their house in Scotland told me when I phoned to make arrangements for her to come and see me. I just had to play the waiting game. Her father was a computer geek and he eventually put a big sticker on the map in the shape of an online profile. I now knew which city and who his employers were. Next to the library and the Auckland telephone directory, bingo I had his address and phone number. Luck was on my side as the person who answered the phone was Teressa.

Despite all the time we spent apart there is no doubt that she is her mothers daughter. We talk alike, we like the same things and we laugh at the same things. She told me it used to drive her step mother mad, because I was there all the time. The other freaky thing is we have talked a lot about our lives in detail and the things we have done are so similar, they are scarey, it is almost as if we have lived the same life at times. Neither of which would be described as normal, but neither were ever planned that way.

I sometimes wonder if I knew that I was going to eventually not be able to get out and about as looking back I seem to have crammed in as much as I could at every turn. I tried, followed, involved and experienced every and anything that came my way, the stranger the places you go, the stranger the things you do and I truly recommend living the abnormal life.

5 thoughts on “Happily living abnormally

  1. I have no idea what ‘normal’ would be and not sure I would want to know. I think the fact that we are all different is what makes the world a wonderful place. It is lovely that despite losing your daughter to another country you managed to find her and stay in touch xx

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  2. Life has so many twists & turns. Of course there are things we may wish happened another way, but at the end of the day those experiences shape you into who you are. I wouldn’t be me any other way. And I’m proud of you too for being the wonderful, strong person you are. I love you mum! 🙂

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  3. Pingback: The cause of MS? | Two Rooms Plus Utilities

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